Sunday 2 August 2009

Mother's Ruin

Since our cat arrived on the scene, both of our fish have died (RIP Sam and Jam), but unless the autopsy reveals Death By Intimidation, the cat's in the clear.

The Australian and I have a good history of keeping fish (we even accidentally bred them once, leading me to run around the flat screaming FISH BABIES FISH BABIES!) but these two have only lasted since March (The Girl's birthday present). When we noticed Jam fading, I googled Fish Euthanasia and discovered that for coldwater fish, clear alcohol is the kindest way. We had a sniff of Tanqueray left, and Jam went out in style (no ice or lemon but a swift end at least). His brother had no such luck - there was no gin left and he snuffed it while I was digging around for an alternative (Pinot Noir? Too light. Pedro Ximenez? Too sweet.)

I broke the news to The Girl. She thought about it for a while, and I stood by squirming. But then: "Oh well! At least I've got a cat!" You sure have, Pollyanna dear. There is absolutely no doubt that we Have A Cat. We have him while we're trying to work, while we're trying to sweep the floor, and while we're trying to sleep... We hear his little bell just as we're about to drift off at night and then DOOF, he leaps onto me, sets his head on the pillow - approximately 2mm from my face - and gives me a look that says: "You have allowed your children into your bed since birth, why not me?" Yes, he's got my number.

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4 comments:

Debs Riccio said...

Emily, that did make me sniggle! pets are great aren't they? Never tried to pickle a goldfish though! One of our cats (Ant) (could've been Dec - it was dark) leapt on my head at 3.30am - just as I was getting over that, I realised he was chasing a sparrow he'd placed on my head earlier. Earlier!! Needless to say, both animals were expelled from my bedroom for - ever. They've never forgiven me. They DO have a 'look' don't they?!

E.G. said...

Eww, I remember the half-dead birdies and mices from our previous cat...I'm not sure I dare let this one out alone though - Australian wildlife seems a bit more treacherous.

Fionnuala said...

Am allergic to cats. He's allergic to dogs. Currently have one fish that has lasted three and a half years. Reckon hes an octigenarian in fish terms?!

E.G. said...

That is highly impressive, Fionnuala. What's your secret? Come on, what are you feeding him?