Wednesday, 19 September 2007

Domestic Blisters (No.1)

It is five years to the day since The Australian's prolific wooing of me finally paid off. Not in the biblical sense - please! - I'm talking romance, here. To mark the occasion (other than with gifts and cards, which we exchanged like children on Christmas morning at about 6.53am) I thought I'd start a new series for my blog about all the things he does around the house that really get up my nose. Romantic, see?

And so to my Domestic Blisters: the things that really rub when you've been living together for some time . . .

No. 1: KNIVES

Why does he always have to use the biggest knife imaginable, no matter what he's cutting? I ask him to slice up some kiwi fruit for The Girl, he produces some sort of Samurai Warrior sword. A few herbs to sprinkle on a salad? Hmm, this is a job for my 16-incher, thinks he. He says he can't cut with small knives. He also wonders why it bothers me so much, and then I point to the huge great shining blade he's left overhanging the kitchen counter and then to the small, inquisitive child.

Ah, but I love him anyway. Happy Anniversary, Australian Smith.

x

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13 comments:

Nik's Blog said...

Happy anny to the both of you.

Nik

Nik's Blog said...

Happy anny to the both of you.

Nik

Ross said...

Real men must use real big knives. It's a fact. Have you not seen Iron Chef? They don't even use knives any more - they use meat cleavers for everything. Wait til he reaches that stage...
Congratulations on the anniversary!

Leena said...

Hmm, I'll have to agree with your husband on this one, Emily. What's the point of using a small knife when you can use a big one? (Then again, that might explain all the cuts on my fingers.)

Happy anniversary!!

LG said...

Happy Anniversary to you!! Big knives? No no no. I use the teeniest knives available.

Pizza cutters are the worst. Imagine if one ran over your toe. Shudders.

Leena said...

Why on earth would a pizza cutter be running over your toe?

LG said...

Well, it depends. What disturbs me about pizza cutters is the way the circular blade runs along, slicing up everything as it goes. Imagine one running along the carpet towards your feet. Shudders x 2. I know. My imagination is flawed...

Ross said...

Funnily enough, the original script for Marathon Man called for Dustin Hoffman's character to have a pizza cutter run over his toes in the infamous torture scene.

LG said...

See. This is a legitimate fear.

Anonymous said...

Hey Emily!!

Just wanted to say hi and comment on how freakin great this blog is; makes me laugh, brightens me day and lots more!!

Happy Anniversary 2 U both, tho thought I better ask: isn't it illegal to marry/co-inhabit with an Australian? I fink it'z coz they bring spiders in with em, just like a bunch of bananas...

:)

Hope yer doin good,

lotsa luv


Dr Davy Skyflyer, Professer of Bunches of Bananas

xxx

Anonymous said...

lol at Lisa and pizza cutters by the way. I think you could use 'em for experimental S & M purposes, but perhaps I shall leave that for another time/place :)

Davy
xxx

writer girl said...

Late to the party as per usual, but hey congratulations.

Mum'sTheWord said...

Can I just say thank you for these comments. This is my biggest comment party ever.

Ever!